My dependency on Supreme Goddess Lorena

Accepting dependency

i am dependent on Supreme Goddess Lorena. my dependence on Her grows every day. And as my dependence grows, i become the person i am ment to be by destiny: a slave and worshipper of Supreme Goddess Lorena. For me, this process of becoming dependent on a Superior Lady is something very intimate. It touches me in the most personal aspects of my life. Supreme Goddess Lorena asks to share this intimate process with you. So i do it. As a lowly male i understand the concept of privacy has less value to me than the concept of submission and obedience. By giving away these private details of my life, i further submit to Supreme Goddess Lorena, and that is what i need to do.

Mother of my submission

i sometimes call Supreme Goddess Lorena the ‘Mother of my submission’. This is maybe the deepest way to state my dependence of Her. By that expression i mean that by accepting my submission Supreme Goddess Lorena gave birth to a new person, to a new ‘me’. i always had submissive feelings, but society oppressed these feelings. So i stumbled around as an incomplete person. By Her very clear way in stating i am a lowly male, ready to submit to Women She opened a new world to me. And by the way She trained and fostered my submission She gave me a warm welcome in that world, Her world of Female Supremacy. i know in Her world i can only be a lowly man. But i know also that if i show the discipline to really become Her slave and worshipper, i will find a state of fulfilment i can never find outside Her world.

Sexual fulfilment

i am dependent on Supreme Goddess Lorena for my sexual fulfilment. In other articles on this blog i wrote about the importance of chastity for Her slaves. Chastity is part of my sexual fulfilment: it makes me less dependent on my penis, and so more ready to be dependent on Supreme Goddess Lorena. But as a male being, i have a natural desire for sexual gratification in a more common sense way too. Also for this sexual pleasure i am dependent on Supreme Goddess Lorena. This sounds strange, because i never met Her and most probably i will never have the honour to even touch Her body. So, how can i be dependent on Her for my sexual pleasure? Simply, because i have orgasms only with Her permission.

In a technical sense, i can have orgasms whenever i want. To hold me in chastity Supreme Goddess Lorena doesn’t use any restraining device. It is jus Her word that decides whether i am in chastity or i am granted an orgasm. But the few times i tried to have an orgasm without Her permission, it didn’t give me the same satisfaction, let alone the deep feeling of fulfilment as do the orgasms i have with Her permission. These orgasms aren’t just orgasms, short moments of male pleasure, they are truly ‘climaxes’, deep moments of union with Her and through Her with nature.

Addicted to work

i am a slave of Supreme Goddess Lorena. This means i have to work for Her. Of course, for me it is an honour a Woman with such superior and delicate needs allows me to contribute to those needs. But working for Her has become just another way of becoming dependent on Her. To work for Her has really become a ‘need’ for me. i feel satisfied when i am satisfied with what i have done for Her. i feel empty if for one reason or another i didn’t do as much work for Her as i hoped to do.

Of course the situation of being a long distance slave makes me somewhat limited in the kind of work i can do for Her. i can do some webwork, i can do some research, i can send Her a part of my wage, i can look for nice gifts for Her. i have to accept that situation. But at the other hand, i crave to serve Her in so many more personal ways. If i see a picture of Supreme Goddess Lorena, i picture myself at Her feet, giving Her a massage, or waiting outside to be Her chauffeur. Supreme Goddess Lorena must be bored by now by my pleas to serve Her in a more personal way. But it is just another part of my dependence on Her: i crave to work for Her, to serve Her in Her needs like an alcoholic craves for the next glass of alcohol.

Spiritual dependency

A last aspect of my dependence on Supreme Goddess Lorena i want to mention is my dependence on Her for spirituality. When i first contacted Supreme Goddess Lorena i thought i had found ‘just another Webmistress’, a Webmistress i liked for Her particular beauty and for Her style of training. And i thought the ‘Goddess-thing’ was just another way to make submissive males mad of desire. And even when i read the spiritual diary and other spiritual writings of Supreme Goddess Lorena for the first time, it didn’t really connect. ‘Interesting but not for me’, i thought. But as it happens often in spiritual matters, one day i understood with my heart, my brain and my soul that Supreme Goddess Lorena is a true Goddess. In so many ways She is linked to the Golden Chain of Female Deity that runs through history.

i am dependent now on Her for my spiritual development. i read Her spiritual writings with other eyes. Everytime She adds something to Her spiritual diary i am shocked by what happened to Her and what She learned about Her destiny. It is by performing the rituals She prescribes i feel closer to Her, to Nature and to my own destiny. By becoming a Lorenaist, spirituality has become something very personal for me. And although i understand within that spiritual tradition i am but a lowly male, i feel at the same time that being a lowly male is just my place in ‘the bigger picture’. And that gives me a kind of inner equilibrium and a kind of energy.

Being strong in my dependence

Being dependent sounds like being weak. It are the strong ones that can be independent. The weaker ones needs to content themselves with being dependent. It is not like a feel it. Being dependent on Supreme Goddess Lorena is like a life time assignment. And one needs discipline to fulfil that assignment, and discipline means strength. As i see it: i am a lowly man, that is my natural condition, nothing can change that. But as a lowly man i have a choice. i can choose for my male ego, but then i end up with an unsatisfactory life. Or i can choose to become dependent on a Superior Woman, and then my life will become so much more satisfactory. But if i make that choice i must face the consequences and work for Her as a slave and become Her devoted worshipper. i have to earn to depend on Her, and hence i have to be strong in my dependence. i thank Supreme Goddess Lorena She is giving me that strength.