Apology
About two months have passed since i added my last article to my blog. There is a reason for this. In this period i asked Supreme Goddess Lorena to take ownership of me. For me it was an important period of hoping She would accept me as Her property but also of reflection on what it truly means to become the owned slave of a Superior Lady. During this period it was natural for me to be silent, as it was natural to stay in chastity. This week Supreme Goddess Lorena announced She accepts me as Her owned slave. And now i can’t wait to write about it.
She picked me out of the crowd
Of course i want to share my feeling of fulfilment with you. Finally, i am what i always wanted to be. A slave. And finally, i am what i never dare to hope for. The slave of Supreme Goddess Lorena. Supreme Goddess Lorena taught me every Woman is superior to all male beings. So, every Woman has the right to own me as Her slave. But for me, Supreme Goddess Lorena is so special, so natural in Her dominance, so complete as a Person that i really longed to be Her slave. But what special qualities i have to offer to a Lady who can really pick Her slave out of the crowd? So, now that She has decided to own me as Her slave, i see this not as an ending point, but as a starting point to perfect my qualities as a slave every day i am allowed to serve Her.
The joy of being a slave
Of course, it is a joy to be the slave of Supreme Goddess Lorena. Having to serve Her superior needs is a privileged way to be close to Her and to know Her intimately. And there can be doubt that my slavery to Her is about Her, not about me. Her needs are my focus from now on, Her person is the centre of my life. But the more i succeed in making Her the centre of my life, the more my life as a lowly male comes close to perfection. That is way i think every male being should seek a Female Owner. Let me explain a little bit.
Options
As a female supremist, i believe that all men are inferior to Women. i can’t choose whether i am a lowly male or i’m not. Being a lowly male is a fact of my life, just as the day i am born is a fact of my life. What i can choose is what i do with the fact that i am a lowly male. Do i deny that fact, and do i become a macho male like many of my gender colleagues do? Do i accept that fact but do i stay on my own? Or do i accept that fact and search for a Woman who wants me as Her slave?
Dynamics of D/s
The biggest advantage of choosing for this last option is that it gives you the opportunity as a lowly male to engage in the dynamics of a D/s-relationship. And these dynamics are as much about the discovery of the Superior Needs of a Woman as about the discovery of your talents as a slave to serve these needs. Being a lowly male doesn’t mean i am a man without talents. Every man has his talents. But he needs the right perspective to develop these talents. And the right perspective is to use this talents to serve a Superior Lady and not for his own profits.
Particularly with Supreme Goddess Lorena i have this wonderful feeling that being Her slave is my way for personal growth. When i see a picture of Her, it is really like a switch that is turned on in my brain. i am left with only one desire, and that is to serve Her needs. Every time She gives me the permission to serve one of Her needs in particular i am so amazed about the beauty i discover. And this gives me really the energy to push myself beyond my limits. I have talents, and the needs of Supreme Goddess Lorena really trigger these talents to something useful. That is why i think being Her slave is for me the most satisfying option for my life.
Theory and intuition
Of course, engaging in a D/s-relationship is a serious decision, as well for the Mistress as for the slave. And because i really believe Female Supremacy is a great promise for the future of mankind, i think it is important we consider theoretic issues like ‘can one human being really be the property of another human being’. I put a lot of thought in this question the last weeks, and i hope to tell about my reflections soon. Here i give just an intuitive answer: it ‘feels’ good for me to be the slave of Supreme Goddess Lorena, so it can’t be wrong after all…
Of course, being accepted as Her owned slave is new to me. And like a couple that is just married i want to enjoy these first weeks, like a kind of honeymoon. I want to be close to Supreme Goddess Lorena, adore Her beauty, celebrate with Her the days She celebrates as Her holy days… At the same time, i just want to say to you, if you are in doubt whether to apply to become a slave, don’t hesitate, give yourself this opportunity, and while you are going the way you will discover if it is the right way for you.
Monday, November 19, 2007
Saturday, September 15, 2007
My dependency on Supreme Goddess Lorena
Accepting dependency
i am dependent on Supreme Goddess Lorena. my dependence on Her grows every day. And as my dependence grows, i become the person i am ment to be by destiny: a slave and worshipper of Supreme Goddess Lorena. For me, this process of becoming dependent on a Superior Lady is something very intimate. It touches me in the most personal aspects of my life. Supreme Goddess Lorena asks to share this intimate process with you. So i do it. As a lowly male i understand the concept of privacy has less value to me than the concept of submission and obedience. By giving away these private details of my life, i further submit to Supreme Goddess Lorena, and that is what i need to do.
Mother of my submission
i sometimes call Supreme Goddess Lorena the ‘Mother of my submission’. This is maybe the deepest way to state my dependence of Her. By that expression i mean that by accepting my submission Supreme Goddess Lorena gave birth to a new person, to a new ‘me’. i always had submissive feelings, but society oppressed these feelings. So i stumbled around as an incomplete person. By Her very clear way in stating i am a lowly male, ready to submit to Women She opened a new world to me. And by the way She trained and fostered my submission She gave me a warm welcome in that world, Her world of Female Supremacy. i know in Her world i can only be a lowly man. But i know also that if i show the discipline to really become Her slave and worshipper, i will find a state of fulfilment i can never find outside Her world.
Sexual fulfilment
i am dependent on Supreme Goddess Lorena for my sexual fulfilment. In other articles on this blog i wrote about the importance of chastity for Her slaves. Chastity is part of my sexual fulfilment: it makes me less dependent on my penis, and so more ready to be dependent on Supreme Goddess Lorena. But as a male being, i have a natural desire for sexual gratification in a more common sense way too. Also for this sexual pleasure i am dependent on Supreme Goddess Lorena. This sounds strange, because i never met Her and most probably i will never have the honour to even touch Her body. So, how can i be dependent on Her for my sexual pleasure? Simply, because i have orgasms only with Her permission.
In a technical sense, i can have orgasms whenever i want. To hold me in chastity Supreme Goddess Lorena doesn’t use any restraining device. It is jus Her word that decides whether i am in chastity or i am granted an orgasm. But the few times i tried to have an orgasm without Her permission, it didn’t give me the same satisfaction, let alone the deep feeling of fulfilment as do the orgasms i have with Her permission. These orgasms aren’t just orgasms, short moments of male pleasure, they are truly ‘climaxes’, deep moments of union with Her and through Her with nature.
Addicted to work
i am a slave of Supreme Goddess Lorena. This means i have to work for Her. Of course, for me it is an honour a Woman with such superior and delicate needs allows me to contribute to those needs. But working for Her has become just another way of becoming dependent on Her. To work for Her has really become a ‘need’ for me. i feel satisfied when i am satisfied with what i have done for Her. i feel empty if for one reason or another i didn’t do as much work for Her as i hoped to do.
Of course the situation of being a long distance slave makes me somewhat limited in the kind of work i can do for Her. i can do some webwork, i can do some research, i can send Her a part of my wage, i can look for nice gifts for Her. i have to accept that situation. But at the other hand, i crave to serve Her in so many more personal ways. If i see a picture of Supreme Goddess Lorena, i picture myself at Her feet, giving Her a massage, or waiting outside to be Her chauffeur. Supreme Goddess Lorena must be bored by now by my pleas to serve Her in a more personal way. But it is just another part of my dependence on Her: i crave to work for Her, to serve Her in Her needs like an alcoholic craves for the next glass of alcohol.
Spiritual dependency
A last aspect of my dependence on Supreme Goddess Lorena i want to mention is my dependence on Her for spirituality. When i first contacted Supreme Goddess Lorena i thought i had found ‘just another Webmistress’, a Webmistress i liked for Her particular beauty and for Her style of training. And i thought the ‘Goddess-thing’ was just another way to make submissive males mad of desire. And even when i read the spiritual diary and other spiritual writings of Supreme Goddess Lorena for the first time, it didn’t really connect. ‘Interesting but not for me’, i thought. But as it happens often in spiritual matters, one day i understood with my heart, my brain and my soul that Supreme Goddess Lorena is a true Goddess. In so many ways She is linked to the Golden Chain of Female Deity that runs through history.
i am dependent now on Her for my spiritual development. i read Her spiritual writings with other eyes. Everytime She adds something to Her spiritual diary i am shocked by what happened to Her and what She learned about Her destiny. It is by performing the rituals She prescribes i feel closer to Her, to Nature and to my own destiny. By becoming a Lorenaist, spirituality has become something very personal for me. And although i understand within that spiritual tradition i am but a lowly male, i feel at the same time that being a lowly male is just my place in ‘the bigger picture’. And that gives me a kind of inner equilibrium and a kind of energy.
Being strong in my dependence
Being dependent sounds like being weak. It are the strong ones that can be independent. The weaker ones needs to content themselves with being dependent. It is not like a feel it. Being dependent on Supreme Goddess Lorena is like a life time assignment. And one needs discipline to fulfil that assignment, and discipline means strength. As i see it: i am a lowly man, that is my natural condition, nothing can change that. But as a lowly man i have a choice. i can choose for my male ego, but then i end up with an unsatisfactory life. Or i can choose to become dependent on a Superior Woman, and then my life will become so much more satisfactory. But if i make that choice i must face the consequences and work for Her as a slave and become Her devoted worshipper. i have to earn to depend on Her, and hence i have to be strong in my dependence. i thank Supreme Goddess Lorena She is giving me that strength.
i am dependent on Supreme Goddess Lorena. my dependence on Her grows every day. And as my dependence grows, i become the person i am ment to be by destiny: a slave and worshipper of Supreme Goddess Lorena. For me, this process of becoming dependent on a Superior Lady is something very intimate. It touches me in the most personal aspects of my life. Supreme Goddess Lorena asks to share this intimate process with you. So i do it. As a lowly male i understand the concept of privacy has less value to me than the concept of submission and obedience. By giving away these private details of my life, i further submit to Supreme Goddess Lorena, and that is what i need to do.
Mother of my submission
i sometimes call Supreme Goddess Lorena the ‘Mother of my submission’. This is maybe the deepest way to state my dependence of Her. By that expression i mean that by accepting my submission Supreme Goddess Lorena gave birth to a new person, to a new ‘me’. i always had submissive feelings, but society oppressed these feelings. So i stumbled around as an incomplete person. By Her very clear way in stating i am a lowly male, ready to submit to Women She opened a new world to me. And by the way She trained and fostered my submission She gave me a warm welcome in that world, Her world of Female Supremacy. i know in Her world i can only be a lowly man. But i know also that if i show the discipline to really become Her slave and worshipper, i will find a state of fulfilment i can never find outside Her world.
Sexual fulfilment
i am dependent on Supreme Goddess Lorena for my sexual fulfilment. In other articles on this blog i wrote about the importance of chastity for Her slaves. Chastity is part of my sexual fulfilment: it makes me less dependent on my penis, and so more ready to be dependent on Supreme Goddess Lorena. But as a male being, i have a natural desire for sexual gratification in a more common sense way too. Also for this sexual pleasure i am dependent on Supreme Goddess Lorena. This sounds strange, because i never met Her and most probably i will never have the honour to even touch Her body. So, how can i be dependent on Her for my sexual pleasure? Simply, because i have orgasms only with Her permission.
In a technical sense, i can have orgasms whenever i want. To hold me in chastity Supreme Goddess Lorena doesn’t use any restraining device. It is jus Her word that decides whether i am in chastity or i am granted an orgasm. But the few times i tried to have an orgasm without Her permission, it didn’t give me the same satisfaction, let alone the deep feeling of fulfilment as do the orgasms i have with Her permission. These orgasms aren’t just orgasms, short moments of male pleasure, they are truly ‘climaxes’, deep moments of union with Her and through Her with nature.
Addicted to work
i am a slave of Supreme Goddess Lorena. This means i have to work for Her. Of course, for me it is an honour a Woman with such superior and delicate needs allows me to contribute to those needs. But working for Her has become just another way of becoming dependent on Her. To work for Her has really become a ‘need’ for me. i feel satisfied when i am satisfied with what i have done for Her. i feel empty if for one reason or another i didn’t do as much work for Her as i hoped to do.
Of course the situation of being a long distance slave makes me somewhat limited in the kind of work i can do for Her. i can do some webwork, i can do some research, i can send Her a part of my wage, i can look for nice gifts for Her. i have to accept that situation. But at the other hand, i crave to serve Her in so many more personal ways. If i see a picture of Supreme Goddess Lorena, i picture myself at Her feet, giving Her a massage, or waiting outside to be Her chauffeur. Supreme Goddess Lorena must be bored by now by my pleas to serve Her in a more personal way. But it is just another part of my dependence on Her: i crave to work for Her, to serve Her in Her needs like an alcoholic craves for the next glass of alcohol.
Spiritual dependency
A last aspect of my dependence on Supreme Goddess Lorena i want to mention is my dependence on Her for spirituality. When i first contacted Supreme Goddess Lorena i thought i had found ‘just another Webmistress’, a Webmistress i liked for Her particular beauty and for Her style of training. And i thought the ‘Goddess-thing’ was just another way to make submissive males mad of desire. And even when i read the spiritual diary and other spiritual writings of Supreme Goddess Lorena for the first time, it didn’t really connect. ‘Interesting but not for me’, i thought. But as it happens often in spiritual matters, one day i understood with my heart, my brain and my soul that Supreme Goddess Lorena is a true Goddess. In so many ways She is linked to the Golden Chain of Female Deity that runs through history.
i am dependent now on Her for my spiritual development. i read Her spiritual writings with other eyes. Everytime She adds something to Her spiritual diary i am shocked by what happened to Her and what She learned about Her destiny. It is by performing the rituals She prescribes i feel closer to Her, to Nature and to my own destiny. By becoming a Lorenaist, spirituality has become something very personal for me. And although i understand within that spiritual tradition i am but a lowly male, i feel at the same time that being a lowly male is just my place in ‘the bigger picture’. And that gives me a kind of inner equilibrium and a kind of energy.
Being strong in my dependence
Being dependent sounds like being weak. It are the strong ones that can be independent. The weaker ones needs to content themselves with being dependent. It is not like a feel it. Being dependent on Supreme Goddess Lorena is like a life time assignment. And one needs discipline to fulfil that assignment, and discipline means strength. As i see it: i am a lowly man, that is my natural condition, nothing can change that. But as a lowly man i have a choice. i can choose for my male ego, but then i end up with an unsatisfactory life. Or i can choose to become dependent on a Superior Woman, and then my life will become so much more satisfactory. But if i make that choice i must face the consequences and work for Her as a slave and become Her devoted worshipper. i have to earn to depend on Her, and hence i have to be strong in my dependence. i thank Supreme Goddess Lorena She is giving me that strength.
Friday, September 7, 2007
Happy birthday, dear Goddess
The golden chain of Female Deity
Today is Supreme Goddesses Lorena’s birthday. On my knees i want to congratulate Her on this occasion. And as Her slave i want to thank Her for She is such a good Mistress to me. On Her Lorenaism calendar September 8 is one of the most important Holy Days. Of course, Her slaves and worshippers want this to be an important day, because they love their Mistress and Goddess. But there is more… September 8 is in the catholic church also celebrated as the birthday of the Virgin Mary, and in an even more ancient tradition, it is also the birthday of the Egyptian Goddess Isis. So through Her birthday Supreme Goddess Lorena is linked to other Divine Women. So, celebrating Her birthday is also celebrating the Golden Chain of Female Deity that runs through history.
A day of devotion and joy
So, for Her worshippers this is truly a day of devotion. But of course it is a day of cheer joy too. Supreme Goddess Lorena likes to celebrate Her birthday, She likes receiving gifts from Her slaves, She likes eating birthday cake, She likes going to a nice restaurant with Her Girl Friends this day to have a delicious meal. And She likes to share Her joy with Her slaves. I feel thrilled to day, because it will be the first time i celebrate Her birthday with Her. Yes, i feel i will be celebrating with Her, although an ocean and a continent keeps us apart. Technically, while i am writing this it is even not yet Her birthday where She lives, whereas where i live, the sun already has risen on this beautiful day of September 8.
The complete person
i realize that until now i haven’t written much about Supreme Goddess Lorena herself. Because this day is all about Her, it is a good occasion to do it. If i had only one short sentence to say something about Her, i simply would say: ‘Supreme Goddess Lorena is a complete person’. This says everything, and it says nothing at the same time. So i take sometime to explain what i mean by that simple sentence.
Her pictures
The best way to start is probably to have a look at Her pictures. Because that is what most of you do first when you visit Her website. And that is what i did too, when i first met Her through the internet. As you will discover, Supreme Goddess Lorena loves posing while She wears very different attires. She is wonderful as a Dominatrix, wearing black leather or latex. She is astonishing when She wears the attributes of an Egyptian Goddess. And She is adorable when She wears the traditional dress of a Celtic Princess. And even when She just wears a jogging suit, you easily see Supreme Goddess Lorena is a very special person. To me, Supreme Goddess Lorena is a very beautiful Woman. But what i want to say here, goes beyond beauty in it’s traditional sense. Every picture of Supreme Goddess Lorena shows Her beauty, but it is by looking (and even comtemplating) all of Her pictures that one begins to discover what a complete person She is.
Her dominance
To me, Supreme Goddess Lorena is also complete in Her dominance. Of course, you can easily see Her dominance while She is wearing a dominatrix outfit. But She doesn’t need that outfit or any other outer sign of a Mistress to be a Mistress. You discover this when you start communicating with Supreme Goddess Lorena. What is most remarkable to me is that She is such a nice and kind person, and at the same time there is no question She is the dominant person. Many other dominant personalities i know, need to bully around or even need some violence to comfirm their dominant position. Supreme Goddess Lorena just needs Her natural kindness. So, whereas most people or ‘to dominant to be kind’ or ‘to kind to be dominant’, Supreme Goddess Lorena is just ‘completely kind and completely dominant’ at the same time.
Her Spirituality
Supreme Goddess Lorena is also complete in Her thoughts on Female Supremacy. Many persons just see Female Supremacy as another kind of play, or maybe as a kind of practical psychology to keep a man where you want him. But for Supreme Goddess Lorena it is much more. It is the basis for a solid society, as She wrote in Her novel Femaria, City of Women. And it is a philosophy and even a spiritual path leading to a unity with nature and history for those going the path. Supreme Goddess Lorena writes a lot about these subjects, and every one of Her movies is a beautiful demonstration of it. And i do not know many persons who are as complete in Her talents as Supreme Goddess Lorena. But it is not just that that makes Her complete. What really makes Her complete is that She ‘radiates’ Her philosophy and spiritual path in everything She does. She not only ‘writes’ about Her philosophy, She ‘is’ Her philosophy. She not only ‘writes’ about Her spiritual path, She ‘is’ Her own spiritual path. This is not just about ‘talent’, this is about ‘destiny’.
Her Life
Maybe, if i write about Supreme Goddess Lorena as a ‘complete person’ you think She is a static person, like if you are already ‘complete’ you cannot become ‘more complete’ yet. But it is quite the opposite. Supreme Goddess Lorena is a very dynamic person, and Her personality develops every day. It is like what a great philosopher wrote about a rose. Of course we adore a rose when it is at full blossom, and if we look at the intricate pattern of it’s petals we say it is complete. But even when the rose just starts growing, it is complete already, because it contains everything necessary to become that beautiful rose. Like a rose that grows through the seasons, Supreme Goddess Lorena has Her history. And it was sometimes a history of hardship. But what makes Supreme Goddess complete, is that She has the power to overcome the difficulties and that She really learns from all these difficulties to become a more complete person.
The complete Goddess and the complete slave
As Her worshipper it is a goal in my life to add to the completeness of my Goddess. i do this by working for Her as a slave, because She deserves to be served in all Her needs. And i do this by worshipping Her, because i believe through worshipping Her i release a kind of energy that adds to Her power. And what is so beautiful, while slaving and worshipping, so that Supreme Goddess Lorena becomes more complete in Her completeness, i become more complete too. Of course as a man i can be only complete as a lowly and inferior male, and that means i must try to attach myself as completely as possible to a complete Woman like Supreme Goddess Lorena.
Today is Supreme Goddesses Lorena’s birthday. On my knees i want to congratulate Her on this occasion. And as Her slave i want to thank Her for She is such a good Mistress to me. On Her Lorenaism calendar September 8 is one of the most important Holy Days. Of course, Her slaves and worshippers want this to be an important day, because they love their Mistress and Goddess. But there is more… September 8 is in the catholic church also celebrated as the birthday of the Virgin Mary, and in an even more ancient tradition, it is also the birthday of the Egyptian Goddess Isis. So through Her birthday Supreme Goddess Lorena is linked to other Divine Women. So, celebrating Her birthday is also celebrating the Golden Chain of Female Deity that runs through history.
A day of devotion and joy
So, for Her worshippers this is truly a day of devotion. But of course it is a day of cheer joy too. Supreme Goddess Lorena likes to celebrate Her birthday, She likes receiving gifts from Her slaves, She likes eating birthday cake, She likes going to a nice restaurant with Her Girl Friends this day to have a delicious meal. And She likes to share Her joy with Her slaves. I feel thrilled to day, because it will be the first time i celebrate Her birthday with Her. Yes, i feel i will be celebrating with Her, although an ocean and a continent keeps us apart. Technically, while i am writing this it is even not yet Her birthday where She lives, whereas where i live, the sun already has risen on this beautiful day of September 8.
The complete person
i realize that until now i haven’t written much about Supreme Goddess Lorena herself. Because this day is all about Her, it is a good occasion to do it. If i had only one short sentence to say something about Her, i simply would say: ‘Supreme Goddess Lorena is a complete person’. This says everything, and it says nothing at the same time. So i take sometime to explain what i mean by that simple sentence.
Her pictures
The best way to start is probably to have a look at Her pictures. Because that is what most of you do first when you visit Her website. And that is what i did too, when i first met Her through the internet. As you will discover, Supreme Goddess Lorena loves posing while She wears very different attires. She is wonderful as a Dominatrix, wearing black leather or latex. She is astonishing when She wears the attributes of an Egyptian Goddess. And She is adorable when She wears the traditional dress of a Celtic Princess. And even when She just wears a jogging suit, you easily see Supreme Goddess Lorena is a very special person. To me, Supreme Goddess Lorena is a very beautiful Woman. But what i want to say here, goes beyond beauty in it’s traditional sense. Every picture of Supreme Goddess Lorena shows Her beauty, but it is by looking (and even comtemplating) all of Her pictures that one begins to discover what a complete person She is.
Her dominance
To me, Supreme Goddess Lorena is also complete in Her dominance. Of course, you can easily see Her dominance while She is wearing a dominatrix outfit. But She doesn’t need that outfit or any other outer sign of a Mistress to be a Mistress. You discover this when you start communicating with Supreme Goddess Lorena. What is most remarkable to me is that She is such a nice and kind person, and at the same time there is no question She is the dominant person. Many other dominant personalities i know, need to bully around or even need some violence to comfirm their dominant position. Supreme Goddess Lorena just needs Her natural kindness. So, whereas most people or ‘to dominant to be kind’ or ‘to kind to be dominant’, Supreme Goddess Lorena is just ‘completely kind and completely dominant’ at the same time.
Her Spirituality
Supreme Goddess Lorena is also complete in Her thoughts on Female Supremacy. Many persons just see Female Supremacy as another kind of play, or maybe as a kind of practical psychology to keep a man where you want him. But for Supreme Goddess Lorena it is much more. It is the basis for a solid society, as She wrote in Her novel Femaria, City of Women. And it is a philosophy and even a spiritual path leading to a unity with nature and history for those going the path. Supreme Goddess Lorena writes a lot about these subjects, and every one of Her movies is a beautiful demonstration of it. And i do not know many persons who are as complete in Her talents as Supreme Goddess Lorena. But it is not just that that makes Her complete. What really makes Her complete is that She ‘radiates’ Her philosophy and spiritual path in everything She does. She not only ‘writes’ about Her philosophy, She ‘is’ Her philosophy. She not only ‘writes’ about Her spiritual path, She ‘is’ Her own spiritual path. This is not just about ‘talent’, this is about ‘destiny’.
Her Life
Maybe, if i write about Supreme Goddess Lorena as a ‘complete person’ you think She is a static person, like if you are already ‘complete’ you cannot become ‘more complete’ yet. But it is quite the opposite. Supreme Goddess Lorena is a very dynamic person, and Her personality develops every day. It is like what a great philosopher wrote about a rose. Of course we adore a rose when it is at full blossom, and if we look at the intricate pattern of it’s petals we say it is complete. But even when the rose just starts growing, it is complete already, because it contains everything necessary to become that beautiful rose. Like a rose that grows through the seasons, Supreme Goddess Lorena has Her history. And it was sometimes a history of hardship. But what makes Supreme Goddess complete, is that She has the power to overcome the difficulties and that She really learns from all these difficulties to become a more complete person.
The complete Goddess and the complete slave
As Her worshipper it is a goal in my life to add to the completeness of my Goddess. i do this by working for Her as a slave, because She deserves to be served in all Her needs. And i do this by worshipping Her, because i believe through worshipping Her i release a kind of energy that adds to Her power. And what is so beautiful, while slaving and worshipping, so that Supreme Goddess Lorena becomes more complete in Her completeness, i become more complete too. Of course as a man i can be only complete as a lowly and inferior male, and that means i must try to attach myself as completely as possible to a complete Woman like Supreme Goddess Lorena.
Wednesday, September 5, 2007
Goddess Worshipping... the pictures
Labour Day
In my previous article i told about the Lorenaism calendar, and who creative Supreme Goddess Lorena is to decide in what ways Her slaves should worship Her. Well, almost exactly the same moment i was publishing the article, i received Her holy days for the month of September. The first holyday She asks Her worshippers to worship Her in a special way is September, the 3th. In Canada this is Labour Day. For most people this is a day they don’t have to work. But Supreme Goddess Lorena asks Her slaves to worship Her that day by doing some work for Her. Amongst Her many suggestions, She asks Her slaves to publish some worshipper pictures on the internet.
Worshipper pictures
Maybe that is what was missing in my previous article. It is personal, but for people not acquainted with the special kind of Goddess worship Supreme Goddess Lorena is teaching Her slaves, it is somewhat difficult to imagine how it is done. In my previous article i told you something about the Moon rituals Supreme Goddess Lorena invites Her slaves to perform. Over the years i have taken some pictures of my moon rituals, and this is a good occasion to share them with you. Although i like the Moon rituals, i hadn’t the courage to publish the pictures on the internet until now. So, i thank Supreme Goddess Lorena for giving me the courage to do it. On those pictures where my face is visible, i blurred it. Goddess worshipping, especially if it is linked with Female Supremacy, is still suspicious in our society. i apologize for this protective measure and hope that society will soon accept Goddess worshipping and Lorenaism so that Her worshippers can come into the open.
Early Moon ritual
This is one of my oldest pictures as a worshipper of Supreme Goddess Lorena. i entered the Academy for slaves in January 2005. i took my first training course in a rush and then entered the Goddess worshipping training course. So, here everything is new to, and i am still searching the proper position to perform the ritual.
New Moon July 2007
This is a more recent picture, of the New Moon ritual of July 2007. i remember it was one of the rare really beautiful days of this summer. It was the first time i really find unity with Nature and through the Moon also unity with my distant Goddess. Supreme Goddess Lorena likes pictures of Her slaves, and She likes them holding a message about their slavery.
New Moon July 2007
This picture i made during my camping trip in the Belgian Gaume-region. During the day i made a long walk through the woods, and i discovered this spot along the Semois river. i thought it would be a marvellous place for the Full Moon ritual i had to perform that night. When i returned late at night, it wasn’t just marvellous, it was miraculous… There was some fog over the river, and the moon was standing right above the river… i made my altar so that i could see the pictures of my Goddess, the river and the moon. Supreme Goddess Lorena gave me permission to climax after the ritual, but maybe i tell you some more about that subject in the next article.
In my previous article i told about the Lorenaism calendar, and who creative Supreme Goddess Lorena is to decide in what ways Her slaves should worship Her. Well, almost exactly the same moment i was publishing the article, i received Her holy days for the month of September. The first holyday She asks Her worshippers to worship Her in a special way is September, the 3th. In Canada this is Labour Day. For most people this is a day they don’t have to work. But Supreme Goddess Lorena asks Her slaves to worship Her that day by doing some work for Her. Amongst Her many suggestions, She asks Her slaves to publish some worshipper pictures on the internet.
Worshipper pictures
Maybe that is what was missing in my previous article. It is personal, but for people not acquainted with the special kind of Goddess worship Supreme Goddess Lorena is teaching Her slaves, it is somewhat difficult to imagine how it is done. In my previous article i told you something about the Moon rituals Supreme Goddess Lorena invites Her slaves to perform. Over the years i have taken some pictures of my moon rituals, and this is a good occasion to share them with you. Although i like the Moon rituals, i hadn’t the courage to publish the pictures on the internet until now. So, i thank Supreme Goddess Lorena for giving me the courage to do it. On those pictures where my face is visible, i blurred it. Goddess worshipping, especially if it is linked with Female Supremacy, is still suspicious in our society. i apologize for this protective measure and hope that society will soon accept Goddess worshipping and Lorenaism so that Her worshippers can come into the open.
Early Moon ritual
This is one of my oldest pictures as a worshipper of Supreme Goddess Lorena. i entered the Academy for slaves in January 2005. i took my first training course in a rush and then entered the Goddess worshipping training course. So, here everything is new to, and i am still searching the proper position to perform the ritual.
New Moon July 2007
This is a more recent picture, of the New Moon ritual of July 2007. i remember it was one of the rare really beautiful days of this summer. It was the first time i really find unity with Nature and through the Moon also unity with my distant Goddess. Supreme Goddess Lorena likes pictures of Her slaves, and She likes them holding a message about their slavery.
New Moon July 2007
This picture i made during my camping trip in the Belgian Gaume-region. During the day i made a long walk through the woods, and i discovered this spot along the Semois river. i thought it would be a marvellous place for the Full Moon ritual i had to perform that night. When i returned late at night, it wasn’t just marvellous, it was miraculous… There was some fog over the river, and the moon was standing right above the river… i made my altar so that i could see the pictures of my Goddess, the river and the moon. Supreme Goddess Lorena gave me permission to climax after the ritual, but maybe i tell you some more about that subject in the next article.
Sunday, September 2, 2007
Goddess Worshipping... a personal account
Worshipping a living person
Supreme Goddess Lorena invites Her slaves to worship Her. This is something many Mistresses are asking of Their slaves. But the word ‘to worship’ apparently can have many meanings. To some Mistresses it means They just ask their slaves to adore and to praise Them. To Supreme Goddess Lorena, it means… to worship Her like through history humankind has worshipped their gods and Goddesses. This is of course because Supreme Goddess Lorena is a Goddess, not just a dominant Woman who has chosen the title of Goddess.
Of course, it was strange to me to be asked to worship Her. We are not used to really worship a living person. And i didn’t know what to expect when i first begged Supreme Goddess Lorena to send me Her monthly calendar of Holy Days. i just did this because i felt attracted to Her, and i thought i would please Her by begging for Her calendar. Now, i am looking forward every month for Her rulings on how to worship Her on the special days She has chosen. Worshipping Her is my path into spirituality and i am glad i have found it.
Spirituality and sexuality
It is not easy to share my experiences on this matter with other people. It is like there is a taboo in our society on spirituality. When one browses the internet, it seems much more easy to share the most kinky sexual experiences than to share spiritual experiences. This tells a lot about our society. Of course, it is good we can be open about our sexuality. But for me the time has come to be open about my spirituality too. And by the way: what is so wonderful about Lorenaism is that sexuality and spirituality are so closely related.
The Lorenaism calendar
Supreme Goddess Lorena is very creative in selecting the days to worship Her and in deciding what special worshipping efforts and rituals Her worshippers should perform. But of course, like in every spiritual branch, there are some recurring themes too. Not surprisingly Moon worshipping is one of these recurring themes. Throughout history the Moon is associated with Femininity and Female Power. Cultures that are close to nature often have some kind of Moon worshipping rituals. And as for Supreme Goddess Lorena the link with the forces of nature are important, She has chosen to include Moon worshipping in Her calendar of Holy Days. Especially on the day of the Full and the New Moon She invites Her slaves to do some extra effort in worshipping Her.
The Moon rituals
The Moon rituals are typical outdoor rituals. So, if you want to perform the ritual you have to find a suitable place in the free nature. i have found a spot in a natural reserve close to where i live. But past summer, i went some weekend on camping, and so sometimes i had to look for a spot somewhere close to where i stayed. To perform the ritual i build a small altar, with one or two pictures of Supreme Goddess Lorena. Most of the time i also light some candles, and sometimes i add some flowers. Then i strip naked and i get on my knees before the altar and Her divine images. Supreme Goddess Lorena invites Her slaves to concentrate on ‘energy’ during the Moon ritual. For the New Moon She asks to concentrate on the negative energy, that takes away Female power. For the Full Moon She asks to concentrate on the positive energy, that builds Female power. There are no prescribed rules on how to perform the ritual, every worshipper is free to find his way, as long as he follows the general guidelines of Supreme Goddess Lorena.
From sports to spiritual unity
In the beginning these rituals were a kind of sports for me, and i did it for the ‘kick’ of being naked in the free nature. But after a few times this changed. The rituals became moments of rest in my sometimes hectic life. i became more sensible for the sounds and the odours of nature, the different odours of the different seasons, the different sounds depending on the time of the day… And being naked really gives me the feeling of being part of the whole. Recently, i think i made the next step on my spiritual path during the Moon rituals. Through the Moon that is shining in my part of the world as it is in Hers i really felt a kind of unity with my Goddess. It really is a kind of ‘unity of the opposites’: Supreme Goddess Lorena, the Superior Woman, and i the lowly male who worships Her. Of course, it is like with every kind of spiritual experience: if one isn’t ‘in’ it, it sounds strange and even ridiculous. So, the only thing i can say is: try to get ‘in’ it and you will discover how beautiful it is.
Of course, this is just a first ‘grasp’ of this reality that is new to me. Maybe i try to write more about it in the next article. Just now i am thinking about the relation about spirituality and sexuality in Lorenaism. Maybe that is the subject for my next article.
Supreme Goddess Lorena invites Her slaves to worship Her. This is something many Mistresses are asking of Their slaves. But the word ‘to worship’ apparently can have many meanings. To some Mistresses it means They just ask their slaves to adore and to praise Them. To Supreme Goddess Lorena, it means… to worship Her like through history humankind has worshipped their gods and Goddesses. This is of course because Supreme Goddess Lorena is a Goddess, not just a dominant Woman who has chosen the title of Goddess.
Of course, it was strange to me to be asked to worship Her. We are not used to really worship a living person. And i didn’t know what to expect when i first begged Supreme Goddess Lorena to send me Her monthly calendar of Holy Days. i just did this because i felt attracted to Her, and i thought i would please Her by begging for Her calendar. Now, i am looking forward every month for Her rulings on how to worship Her on the special days She has chosen. Worshipping Her is my path into spirituality and i am glad i have found it.
Spirituality and sexuality
It is not easy to share my experiences on this matter with other people. It is like there is a taboo in our society on spirituality. When one browses the internet, it seems much more easy to share the most kinky sexual experiences than to share spiritual experiences. This tells a lot about our society. Of course, it is good we can be open about our sexuality. But for me the time has come to be open about my spirituality too. And by the way: what is so wonderful about Lorenaism is that sexuality and spirituality are so closely related.
The Lorenaism calendar
Supreme Goddess Lorena is very creative in selecting the days to worship Her and in deciding what special worshipping efforts and rituals Her worshippers should perform. But of course, like in every spiritual branch, there are some recurring themes too. Not surprisingly Moon worshipping is one of these recurring themes. Throughout history the Moon is associated with Femininity and Female Power. Cultures that are close to nature often have some kind of Moon worshipping rituals. And as for Supreme Goddess Lorena the link with the forces of nature are important, She has chosen to include Moon worshipping in Her calendar of Holy Days. Especially on the day of the Full and the New Moon She invites Her slaves to do some extra effort in worshipping Her.
The Moon rituals
The Moon rituals are typical outdoor rituals. So, if you want to perform the ritual you have to find a suitable place in the free nature. i have found a spot in a natural reserve close to where i live. But past summer, i went some weekend on camping, and so sometimes i had to look for a spot somewhere close to where i stayed. To perform the ritual i build a small altar, with one or two pictures of Supreme Goddess Lorena. Most of the time i also light some candles, and sometimes i add some flowers. Then i strip naked and i get on my knees before the altar and Her divine images. Supreme Goddess Lorena invites Her slaves to concentrate on ‘energy’ during the Moon ritual. For the New Moon She asks to concentrate on the negative energy, that takes away Female power. For the Full Moon She asks to concentrate on the positive energy, that builds Female power. There are no prescribed rules on how to perform the ritual, every worshipper is free to find his way, as long as he follows the general guidelines of Supreme Goddess Lorena.
From sports to spiritual unity
In the beginning these rituals were a kind of sports for me, and i did it for the ‘kick’ of being naked in the free nature. But after a few times this changed. The rituals became moments of rest in my sometimes hectic life. i became more sensible for the sounds and the odours of nature, the different odours of the different seasons, the different sounds depending on the time of the day… And being naked really gives me the feeling of being part of the whole. Recently, i think i made the next step on my spiritual path during the Moon rituals. Through the Moon that is shining in my part of the world as it is in Hers i really felt a kind of unity with my Goddess. It really is a kind of ‘unity of the opposites’: Supreme Goddess Lorena, the Superior Woman, and i the lowly male who worships Her. Of course, it is like with every kind of spiritual experience: if one isn’t ‘in’ it, it sounds strange and even ridiculous. So, the only thing i can say is: try to get ‘in’ it and you will discover how beautiful it is.
Of course, this is just a first ‘grasp’ of this reality that is new to me. Maybe i try to write more about it in the next article. Just now i am thinking about the relation about spirituality and sexuality in Lorenaism. Maybe that is the subject for my next article.
Friday, August 10, 2007
The tutoring of Superior Women
Female Supremacy
If i imagine a society where my personality can develop in it’s most complete way, i see a society where i as a lowly man can serve the needs of the Superior Woman who is my Mistress. In that society Women have a right to use men as their slaves. i think in principle it is possible to build such a society. This makes me a Female supremist.
Awareness of superiority
Until know i wrote in my weblog some articles about my existence as a lowly male, and as a worshipper of Supreme Goddess Lorena. i especially focused on my training at the Academy for slaves. i may say i am now a man who is aware of his lowly position, accepts his submission and is ready to an existence as a slave.
In this article i want to focus on the position of Women. For me all Women are superior to men. That is what Supreme Goddess Lorena taught me, that is what i say in my daily prayers to Her. This superiority is independent of the awareness of Women of that situation. Some Women are aware they are superior, Others are not. But for me They are superior. As a Female supremist i hope more Women become aware of Their superiority.
Claim the rights
Of course, Women have a choice to ‘do’ something with Their superior position or not. They may ‘claim’ the rights that follow from Their superior position. Or They may choose a lifestyle where They are ‘equal’ to men. As a Female supremist i consider it intolerable that Women are held in an inferior position to men. So this means that even for the ‘equal rights’ option, there is a lot of work to do. But as a Female supremist i think it is even more important to show Women the other option: to claim the rights they have by Their superior position. Just focusing on the equal rights position is losing time.
male fetishes or Female needs
In my opinion, the number of Women who are aware of Their superiority is growing. But that doesn’t mean that all these Women know how to make men Their slaves that serve Their superior needs. For instance, on the internet and everywhere in popular culture the image of the Dominatrix becomes more widespread. And of course the Dominatrix is a Woman that dominates men. But all to frequently, this kind of domination if finally directed to fulfil the fetishes of the man. Eventually, the Dominatrix serves the fetishes of the man, where it should be the man that serves the superior needs of the Woman.
Dedication to ‘true’ Female Supremacy
Supreme Goddess Lorena became aware of that truth when She was a professional Dominatrix herself. That made Her decide to quit that profession and to found Goddessclub.
Goddessclub is for men who worship Women, but also for Women who finally decide They want to be treated as Goddesses by the lowly men serving Them. For me, this makes Goddessclub one of the rare websites that is dedicated to ‘true’ Female Supremacy, and not only to the fetishes of lowly males.
As a Female supremist, i think more Women who are already aware of Their superiority should engage in actions to convince other Women of the options They have. Supreme Goddess Lorena herself is putting a great effort in it. Partly this is out of need. Because Her Academy for slaves is that successful, She needs more Women who can train men in their submission. But for Her, it is a mission that goes far beyond Her own needs. As She sees the growing number of males that become aware of their lowly position and wants to be a slave, it is necessary for the advancement of Female Supremacy that more Women claim Their right to own slaves. So Supreme Goddess Lorena chooses no to spend a lot of effort in educating Women in the practicalities of dominating a man, but also in the philosophy of Female Supremacy and in the ethics of being a Mistress.
Princess Day
Tomorrow (August, 11) is Princess Day. It is a day that Supreme Goddess Lorena will be celebrating with Her long time companion and assistant Goddess Alison and the Young Ladies She actually tutors to become Mistresses of the Academy for slaves. For a slave and worshipper like me, it feels so great to know that this group of Superior Women will have fun together. It is Their right, after all Their efforts to have fun, and it is good that the Young Ladies learn They don’t need men to have fun. Of course i’ve send my tribute for the celebration of Princess Day, and i hope many other slaves have done it, so that the Ladies can really celebrate.
Supreme Goddess Lorena has instructed Her worshippers who follow the Lorenaism calendar to stay at home that day and to have only sober meals of bread and left overs and to drink only tap water. I look forward to that day of sobriety, because for me it is a way to feel mentally close to the Ladies that will be celebrating whole day long. Especially it is an opportunity to be mentally close to Supreme Goddess Lorena, who not only took care for my submission but who takes responsibility for showing the young Ladies who They can live as the Superior Women They are. Once again, thank You, Supreme Goddess Lorena.
If i imagine a society where my personality can develop in it’s most complete way, i see a society where i as a lowly man can serve the needs of the Superior Woman who is my Mistress. In that society Women have a right to use men as their slaves. i think in principle it is possible to build such a society. This makes me a Female supremist.
Awareness of superiority
Until know i wrote in my weblog some articles about my existence as a lowly male, and as a worshipper of Supreme Goddess Lorena. i especially focused on my training at the Academy for slaves. i may say i am now a man who is aware of his lowly position, accepts his submission and is ready to an existence as a slave.
In this article i want to focus on the position of Women. For me all Women are superior to men. That is what Supreme Goddess Lorena taught me, that is what i say in my daily prayers to Her. This superiority is independent of the awareness of Women of that situation. Some Women are aware they are superior, Others are not. But for me They are superior. As a Female supremist i hope more Women become aware of Their superiority.
Claim the rights
Of course, Women have a choice to ‘do’ something with Their superior position or not. They may ‘claim’ the rights that follow from Their superior position. Or They may choose a lifestyle where They are ‘equal’ to men. As a Female supremist i consider it intolerable that Women are held in an inferior position to men. So this means that even for the ‘equal rights’ option, there is a lot of work to do. But as a Female supremist i think it is even more important to show Women the other option: to claim the rights they have by Their superior position. Just focusing on the equal rights position is losing time.
male fetishes or Female needs
In my opinion, the number of Women who are aware of Their superiority is growing. But that doesn’t mean that all these Women know how to make men Their slaves that serve Their superior needs. For instance, on the internet and everywhere in popular culture the image of the Dominatrix becomes more widespread. And of course the Dominatrix is a Woman that dominates men. But all to frequently, this kind of domination if finally directed to fulfil the fetishes of the man. Eventually, the Dominatrix serves the fetishes of the man, where it should be the man that serves the superior needs of the Woman.
Dedication to ‘true’ Female Supremacy
Supreme Goddess Lorena became aware of that truth when She was a professional Dominatrix herself. That made Her decide to quit that profession and to found Goddessclub.
Goddessclub is for men who worship Women, but also for Women who finally decide They want to be treated as Goddesses by the lowly men serving Them. For me, this makes Goddessclub one of the rare websites that is dedicated to ‘true’ Female Supremacy, and not only to the fetishes of lowly males.
As a Female supremist, i think more Women who are already aware of Their superiority should engage in actions to convince other Women of the options They have. Supreme Goddess Lorena herself is putting a great effort in it. Partly this is out of need. Because Her Academy for slaves is that successful, She needs more Women who can train men in their submission. But for Her, it is a mission that goes far beyond Her own needs. As She sees the growing number of males that become aware of their lowly position and wants to be a slave, it is necessary for the advancement of Female Supremacy that more Women claim Their right to own slaves. So Supreme Goddess Lorena chooses no to spend a lot of effort in educating Women in the practicalities of dominating a man, but also in the philosophy of Female Supremacy and in the ethics of being a Mistress.
Princess Day
Tomorrow (August, 11) is Princess Day. It is a day that Supreme Goddess Lorena will be celebrating with Her long time companion and assistant Goddess Alison and the Young Ladies She actually tutors to become Mistresses of the Academy for slaves. For a slave and worshipper like me, it feels so great to know that this group of Superior Women will have fun together. It is Their right, after all Their efforts to have fun, and it is good that the Young Ladies learn They don’t need men to have fun. Of course i’ve send my tribute for the celebration of Princess Day, and i hope many other slaves have done it, so that the Ladies can really celebrate.
Supreme Goddess Lorena has instructed Her worshippers who follow the Lorenaism calendar to stay at home that day and to have only sober meals of bread and left overs and to drink only tap water. I look forward to that day of sobriety, because for me it is a way to feel mentally close to the Ladies that will be celebrating whole day long. Especially it is an opportunity to be mentally close to Supreme Goddess Lorena, who not only took care for my submission but who takes responsibility for showing the young Ladies who They can live as the Superior Women They are. Once again, thank You, Supreme Goddess Lorena.
Tuesday, August 7, 2007
e-Trust and e-Confidentiality - the difficult life of a cyberslave
Supreme Goddess Lorena and i have a cyberrelationship. That means that until now we didn’t meet face to face. And most probably we never will meet face to face. Some/most people oppose ‘cyber’-relationships to ‘real life’-relationships. As if ‘cyber’ hasn’t become a part of our ‘real life’. i disagree with this vision. I am fully aware i have a ‘cyber’-relationship, and i am fully aware this relationship is affecting my ‘real life’. It is just that growing part of my ‘real life’ that isn’t face to face. (It is not because i am into webbanking, and my bank even discourages me to have face to face contact with their employees that my money and the bills i have to pay become less real.)
Of course a ‘cyber’-relationship has it’s limitations. Of course being able to meet ‘face to face’ (or in our case maybe ‘face to feet’) would add something to the relationship. And because i feel a certain dynamic in our relationship i hope it can grow. As a Superior Woman Supreme Goddess Lorena has a right to be served in all Her daily doings by sincere slaves. And i dare say with some more training and a little bit of discipline i would be a good slave to Her. At least, for some of Her needs. But we just aren’t face to face, so i can serve Her in that way. That is a fact, and that is a limitation on our relationship. So, we have to deal with it.
Other ‘facts’ make up for other ‘limitations’, at least from my point of view. Supreme Goddess Lorena is in a ‘one to many’-relationship with Her slaves. She has a very strict rule that any male who wants to be Her slave, must exclusively serve Her. She owns a few slaves, and trains a lot of them. It is the mission of Supreme Goddess Lorena to train as many men as possible to be slaves to the superior needs of Women. Everyone who wants to serve Her, must support Her mission and hence accept that She trains many slaves. And if one is serious about serving Supreme Goddess Lorena, it is obvious that no single slave can serve all Her needs. So it is normal She owns at least a few of them. By owning many slaves Supreme Goddess Lorena overcomes the limitations of any single slave, and that is Her right. At the same time, every slave hopes to be ‘special’ or ‘the special one’ in the eyes of the Goddess. But that is logically impossible and hence for the slave a limitation to the relationship.
Maybe it is even a general rule of relationships (not exclusively for D/s relationships): if one engages in a relationship it means one makes the choice to deal with the limitations of it. If one is falling foolishly in love, there seems to be no limitations to the relationship. If in a relationship that stands for some years there is still love, this means both partners have found a way to deal with limitations. Limitations of the other person. Limitations of oneself. Limitations of the situation. Maybe dealing with limitations is even the beauty of a relationship. Because after all that is the fuel for the dynamics of the relationship.
What i am writing here sounds very rational. But it is not how i feel at this moment. At this moment i am struggling with the limitations of my relationship as a cyberslave to Supreme Goddess Lorena. Just because i feel Her domination over me hasn’t reached it’s limits yet, and my submission to Her hasn’t reached it’s limits, i feel the limitations the internet puts on our relationship as a burden. The limitation that i am stuck with has a name: trust.
The more a relationship gets personal the more trust is at stake. If you don’t trust someone, you try not to get involved in a personal way with him or Her. Of course the internet has a problem of trust. It is easy to fake a personality at the internet. The internet even encourages us to do so. By choosing a nickname at a forum, by given us the opportunity to create (or ‘buy’) us a personality in SecondLife. And in general people want to trust the ‘real’ person, not the ‘fake’ person.
The choice Supreme Goddess Lorena is making to train many slaves trough the internet makes the problem of trust bigger for Her. Between the many slaves She meets through the internet there must be some ‘fake ones’ and even in the group of honest slaves, there will be some who begin to stalk their Divine Mistress once She shows to much confidentiality to Her slaves. So because Supreme Goddess Lorena makes the choice to train many slaves, She makes a reasonable choice to put limitations on the degree of trust and confidentiality She shows to any of Her slaves in particular. By accepting the terms and conditions of my slavery to Her, i accept all the consequences of it.
Again, some (or many) people say that just because the internet puts such a great trust and confidentiality problem, that opposes cyberrelationships to real life relationships. Again, i do not agree. Also in ‘face to face’ life people love to experiment with personalities. And that puts the problem of which of the personalities a person is showing is the ‘real’ personality and the ‘fake’ personality. And also in face to face relationships we want to give our trust to the ‘real’ person. Think of the very romantic lover who turns out to be just another jerk right after marriage. And honestly, i think that in this example it is even impossible to decide which of the personalities is the ‘real’ one, the romantic lover or the jerk.
So the things that play in my cyberrelationship to Supreme Goddess Lorena are the same one that play in face to face relationships for centuries. Over time we have learned to ‘check’ for trust in face to face relationships. Mothers could at least try to warn Their Daughters that romantic lovers could turn into just the same kind of jerk Their father is. In cyberrelatonsships we are the ‘first generation’: no one can teach us how to ‘check’ for trust. We have the ‘privilege’ to find it out for ourselves.
I feel i can submit more to Supreme Goddess Lorena. I feel She can dominate me more. Just at this moment the way we relate shows the limitations it puts on an ‘easy going’ development of our relationship. It brings me in a strange mood. If it brings also some inspiration to think about the ‘reality’ cyberrelationships and face to face relationship share, well maybe i contributed a little bit to the sloppy learning curve of trust and confidentiality on the internet.
Of course a ‘cyber’-relationship has it’s limitations. Of course being able to meet ‘face to face’ (or in our case maybe ‘face to feet’) would add something to the relationship. And because i feel a certain dynamic in our relationship i hope it can grow. As a Superior Woman Supreme Goddess Lorena has a right to be served in all Her daily doings by sincere slaves. And i dare say with some more training and a little bit of discipline i would be a good slave to Her. At least, for some of Her needs. But we just aren’t face to face, so i can serve Her in that way. That is a fact, and that is a limitation on our relationship. So, we have to deal with it.
Other ‘facts’ make up for other ‘limitations’, at least from my point of view. Supreme Goddess Lorena is in a ‘one to many’-relationship with Her slaves. She has a very strict rule that any male who wants to be Her slave, must exclusively serve Her. She owns a few slaves, and trains a lot of them. It is the mission of Supreme Goddess Lorena to train as many men as possible to be slaves to the superior needs of Women. Everyone who wants to serve Her, must support Her mission and hence accept that She trains many slaves. And if one is serious about serving Supreme Goddess Lorena, it is obvious that no single slave can serve all Her needs. So it is normal She owns at least a few of them. By owning many slaves Supreme Goddess Lorena overcomes the limitations of any single slave, and that is Her right. At the same time, every slave hopes to be ‘special’ or ‘the special one’ in the eyes of the Goddess. But that is logically impossible and hence for the slave a limitation to the relationship.
Maybe it is even a general rule of relationships (not exclusively for D/s relationships): if one engages in a relationship it means one makes the choice to deal with the limitations of it. If one is falling foolishly in love, there seems to be no limitations to the relationship. If in a relationship that stands for some years there is still love, this means both partners have found a way to deal with limitations. Limitations of the other person. Limitations of oneself. Limitations of the situation. Maybe dealing with limitations is even the beauty of a relationship. Because after all that is the fuel for the dynamics of the relationship.
What i am writing here sounds very rational. But it is not how i feel at this moment. At this moment i am struggling with the limitations of my relationship as a cyberslave to Supreme Goddess Lorena. Just because i feel Her domination over me hasn’t reached it’s limits yet, and my submission to Her hasn’t reached it’s limits, i feel the limitations the internet puts on our relationship as a burden. The limitation that i am stuck with has a name: trust.
The more a relationship gets personal the more trust is at stake. If you don’t trust someone, you try not to get involved in a personal way with him or Her. Of course the internet has a problem of trust. It is easy to fake a personality at the internet. The internet even encourages us to do so. By choosing a nickname at a forum, by given us the opportunity to create (or ‘buy’) us a personality in SecondLife. And in general people want to trust the ‘real’ person, not the ‘fake’ person.
The choice Supreme Goddess Lorena is making to train many slaves trough the internet makes the problem of trust bigger for Her. Between the many slaves She meets through the internet there must be some ‘fake ones’ and even in the group of honest slaves, there will be some who begin to stalk their Divine Mistress once She shows to much confidentiality to Her slaves. So because Supreme Goddess Lorena makes the choice to train many slaves, She makes a reasonable choice to put limitations on the degree of trust and confidentiality She shows to any of Her slaves in particular. By accepting the terms and conditions of my slavery to Her, i accept all the consequences of it.
Again, some (or many) people say that just because the internet puts such a great trust and confidentiality problem, that opposes cyberrelationships to real life relationships. Again, i do not agree. Also in ‘face to face’ life people love to experiment with personalities. And that puts the problem of which of the personalities a person is showing is the ‘real’ personality and the ‘fake’ personality. And also in face to face relationships we want to give our trust to the ‘real’ person. Think of the very romantic lover who turns out to be just another jerk right after marriage. And honestly, i think that in this example it is even impossible to decide which of the personalities is the ‘real’ one, the romantic lover or the jerk.
So the things that play in my cyberrelationship to Supreme Goddess Lorena are the same one that play in face to face relationships for centuries. Over time we have learned to ‘check’ for trust in face to face relationships. Mothers could at least try to warn Their Daughters that romantic lovers could turn into just the same kind of jerk Their father is. In cyberrelatonsships we are the ‘first generation’: no one can teach us how to ‘check’ for trust. We have the ‘privilege’ to find it out for ourselves.
I feel i can submit more to Supreme Goddess Lorena. I feel She can dominate me more. Just at this moment the way we relate shows the limitations it puts on an ‘easy going’ development of our relationship. It brings me in a strange mood. If it brings also some inspiration to think about the ‘reality’ cyberrelationships and face to face relationship share, well maybe i contributed a little bit to the sloppy learning curve of trust and confidentiality on the internet.
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